Sixteen years after Larry
Nassar first sexually abused her, Rachael Denhollander decided to publicly
reveal that she had been one of the many victims of the USA Gymnastics team
doctor. The former gymnast, who was a 15-year-old homeschooler when she says
Nassar started abusing her, became the first to publicly make allegations
against the respected Michigan State University faculty member.
In January 2018,
Denhollander became the last of more than 150 survivors—all women and almost
entirely former gymnasts—to share her impact statement in court with Nassar,
who was convicted of seven counts of first-degree criminal sexual contact and sentenced to up to 175 years in prison.
Rachael’s statement in
court was especially powerful because it was infused with the Gospel and her
decision to overcome evil with good. Here is part of what she told her abuser:
“In
our early hearings. you brought your Bible into the courtroom and you have
spoken of praying for forgiveness. And so it is on that basis that I appeal to
you. If you have read the Bible you carry, you know the definition of
sacrificial love portrayed is of God himself loving so sacrificially that he
gave up everything to pay a penalty for the sin he did not commit. By his grace,
I, too, choose to love this way.
You
spoke of praying for forgiveness. But Larry, if you have read the Bible you
carry, you know forgiveness does not come from doing good things, as if good
deeds can erase what you have done. It comes from repentance which requires
facing and acknowledging the truth about what you have done in all of its utter
depravity and horror without mitigation, without excuse, without acting as if
good deeds can erase what you have seen this courtroom today.
The
Bible you speak carries a final judgment where all of God's wrath and eternal
terror is poured out on men like you. Should you ever reach the point of truly
facing what you have done, the guilt will be crushing. And that is what makes
the gospel of Christ so sweet. Because it extends grace and hope and mercy
where none should be found. And it will be there for you.
I
pray you experience the soul crushing weight of guilt so you may someday
experience true repentance and true forgiveness from God, which you need far
more than forgiveness from me -- though I extend that to you as well.
Throughout
this process, I have clung to a quote by C.S. Lewis, where he says, my argument
against God was that the universe seems so cruel and unjust. But how did I get
this idea of just, unjust? A man does not call a line crooked unless he first
has some idea of straight. What was I comparing the universe to when I called
it unjust?
Larry,
I can call what you did evil and wicked because it was. And I know it was evil
and wicked because the straight line exists. The straight line is not measured
based on your perception or anyone else's perception, and this means I can
speak the truth about my abuse without minimization or mitigation. And I can
call it evil because I know what goodness is. And this is why I pity you.
Because when a person loses the ability to define good and evil, when they
cannot define evil, they can no longer define and enjoy what is truly good.”[1]
After reflecting on
Rachel’s words, I am taken back to Paul’s counterintuitive passage in Romans
about how to defeat evil. “19 Beloved,
never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written,
“Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” 20 To the contrary, “if your
enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for
by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” 21 Do not be overcome by
evil, but overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:19-21)
We can’t survive life’s
traumas if we don’t learn to forgive others. When we forgive someone, we are
not excusing or condoning their actions. We are choosing to release the
bitterness that can poison our souls. We are letting a ray of compassion break
through the clouds, so we can forgive as God has forgiven us.
Every act of grace and
mercy given in the face of evil provides the opportunity for something that
cannot be achieved through “getting even”—reconciliation, redemption, victory.
This is what Jesus did on the cross. He absorbed the evil of mankind into his
body and transformed into the redemption of humanity. Love doesn't defeat evil
through the exercise of power. Love defeats evil by absorbing its harm and
transforming it into good. -DM
[1] Read
Rachael Denhollander's Full Victim Impact Statement about Larry Nassar, CNN, 30 January 2018 <https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2018/01/24/us/rachael-denhollander-full-statement/index.html>
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